Experience... Inexperience...

Although it has only been about 0.5 month since my last entry, but I feel that there's something really worth typing here today. So here it is...

If you've been reading my previous entries, you may know that I was pretty happy with the new organization that I had joined. It was an organization that aimed at training leaders for the future... or at least so they claim... Now I don't doubt that is what they may try to do... but they're certainly not doing a very good job of it. They call themselves Future Leaders. And being in their organizing committe for a gala even for the past month, I had seen nothing that would come out of training young professionals to be leaders, instead, all I saw was what I'd call a show. During my time there, I have seen ideas either ignored or in my case, designs argued over, just because the President didn't like it. It was felt that there was no need for any reasons, just that he likes something else better. Now this is prefectly fine, if they had said this in the beginning, or at least not tell people "we'll welcome and consider all ideas and suggestions."... or in my case "let's show your design to everyone at the next meeting and see what they have to say.". In my case, they all liked mine over the template that the President had in mind. But the guy took one look at mine and says - "I don't like it." With culture like this, how are they going to convince me that they are helping young professionals to be leaders?! When other members suggested other potential speakers for the event, the Pres said - "I think it'll be best if we get Person A and Person B." In order to help change this for both ourselves and everyone else... a few of us wrote to the board to see if this is really what they wanted. In the beginning, the signal we got was one of concern. But afterwards, it turns out the board is behind the Pres.' way of managing things. In the process, we (the people who initiated to change things) got booted out of the organization. During those few days though, it went from threats of libel (to me..) and constant phone calls and long conversations from the Pres. (Those conversations were really a waste of time in my opinion.... listening to someone sell how "right" they are... and how "wrong" you are.) In brief, yes, it is all politics. But this was a campaign in an effort to "save" the organization, and not ruin it. We weren't out to kick the Pres. out. At least I wouldn't support it if it came to that. But from the Pres.' efforts to talk to people 1-on-1 on the phone and not letting the concerns discussed in the public, just shows that they have a hidden agenda. And today, when I found out that the board is behind it, it has gone from a discredit to the Pres. to the organization as a whole. Again, if they made it clear that they're here to get free labourers, then say so. Disguising itself as an organization that welcomes ideas is just going to fail eventually. So warn your friends about this Future Leaders organization. I'm sure sooner or later, they'll hear about it.

Now in dealing with this... I had found places where my lack of experience had put me at a disadvantage. It's interesting, cause in a way it hurts... but I'm also very happy to see them now, cause I can then learn not to make the same mistakes again. But over the past few days, as I look upon this, I sometimes find that petty arguments between church groups or even friends, are really nothing. The world is big, and there are a lot more idiots you can fight with, with causes a lot more worth your time and effort to fight on. But what makes this experience even more rewarding, is the fact that the lessons learned will help me become a better entrepreneure... (hopefully!)

Here are some of the things I've learned or were reminded of:

1. If you are to learn and to grow up... you really must stick your head out and risk getting it chopped. Reading about it, thinking about, just won't do the job, experiencing it is what counts. Now this applies to all aspects to life, from faith to business to life.

2. You can never change someone. You can only inspire that person to change. Whether or not the change happens, it's up to that person. If you have some responsibility towards that person, all you can do is remind that person often.

3. To be a good leader, especially today, you must be willing to listen and to inspire the people you work with. This I knew before I walked in to this group. But having been through this, I see how one can easily miss it.

4. In regards to risk-taking, you must also be willing to accept failure. Failure comes in many forms... for me, in this, my failure may have been how things was handled. But without this failure, I may never have learned. Looking back, I must be able to accept the fact that wrong decisions were made, but this is not the end of it all. Looking forward, there are still infinate possibilities for success and many more mistakes that I may make. But hey, that just proves I'm human! =P

5. There are many fakes out there, especially in busines. Knowing how to handle them takes experience, no textbook can teach us that... unfortunately! The only thing I know of that can help you deal with these people is confidence in yourself and learn more about this world.


Of these lesseons, I think that a fear of failure is one of my biggest hurdle so far... and I must say, I still haven't gotten a handle on it yet... not that I've been successful thoughout my life. But in reading a book, I was told that behavioural scientists says that we are born with only two fears - fear of falling and fear of loud noises - the other fears are learned. The book teaches an idea of facing your greatest fear first, then the rest will seem small. So how should I face my fear of failure?? Do all the impossible tasks that I can think off? =P

Well looking back at the result, I'm actually pretty happy that it's over. With everyone being able to tell others of their works when the job is done, I wouldn't have been able to. The reason for this is that as the owner of a web design company, it would do me bad more than good to tell someone that the website I made was based on a template! And in the process, forced to do a design that I didn't like, with no real compensation for my time and effort... I would have left anyways. But the trouble was finding a way to leave without others thinking I dropped the ball. Now, it's not my choice, but their choice. I hope that people will start asking questions and see through the stupid disguise the Pres. has made. As for me, I'm already looking ahead to perhaps other business organizations, bigger and perhaps more professional. But this time, I won't help them with anything, I'm just going to be greedy and just be there to benefit me. Their compensation..? My membership fee! =P (which isn't cheap!)

Interesting Note: Pleonexia is a clinical term for morbid greediness.